This is one of those movies that you try really hard to enjoy because you want to enjoy it. And even if you left the theatre having had fun, you can’t help but admit to yourself that it was a terrible movie. It relies heavily on pleasing the viewer through Nostalgia from the original trilogy;…
Bird Box: a great opening scene, and lots to argue about
It also gave us a great reason to reminisce about how terrible “The Happening” was…
After-Movie-Conversations: The Huntsman: Winters War
Maybe it was a date, but above was the actual conversation I had with the girl after this movie. Date or not, there was no follow-up. People really liked Charlize Theron’s Ravana in the Snow White and the Huntsman, but they were considerably less enthusiastic about Kristen Stewart’s Snow White. Kind of amazing, then, that…
X’s and Eggs
Do you know what it means, when you see an egg with an ‘X’ on it? I bet you do. I do. But why? Why do I know? Did someone tell me? If they did, it was a very long time ago. If they didn’t, I must have just figured it out. But what I’m…
Bad Mug
Some people would look at a mug, and figure it’s the same as every other mug. People have favourite mugs, but that’s just because of hte picture, right? Or maybe it has some sentamental significance — it was a gift, or a prize or something. Maybe you think that mug technology has been perfected, and…
Judging Sequels: Norm Macdonald, Anna Kournikova, and The Matrix Trilogy
I remember, on more than one occassion, jumping to the defense of The Matrix: Reloaded. Shitty title, yes, but people were talking about what a terrible movie it was — but it wasn’t terrible. I liked to say that it was the Anna Kornikova of movies — Anna Kournikova was a great tennis player she…
BAD MOVIES: Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice
Aside from bad acting, a stupid plot, bad dialogue, and bad pacing, the movie went on 40min longer than it should have. It ended. And then it kept going. For 40 more minutes! It didn’t help that the best part of the movie was Wonder Woman, who isn’t featured in the title and only really…
Rubber Band Handle Grip
On Christmas I was given a lovely bottle of blueberry syrup. My brother flew it from my parents’ place (I rarely check a bag, and as of this writing, the stupid ‘no-liquids-through-airport-security’ rule is still in effect), and eventually, after a several days, I was able to reunite with the victual. But when I was…